Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
time to smoke my breakfast
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Randomize
