I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Randomize
