I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
