Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Your cock deserves a montage
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
