i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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