i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Randomize
