Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
