hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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