if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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