Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
At least life still wants to fuck me.
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