Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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