We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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