3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Randomize
