I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize