you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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