We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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