Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
