so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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