i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
No subtext here. People are naked.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
