well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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