I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
