I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
