So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
