Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Randomize
