just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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