I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
