You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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