problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
