im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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