it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
