I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize