Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Randomize
