Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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