You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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