Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
