so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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