so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize