maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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