the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Such a big mess for such a small penis
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
