people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
