White coat. Heels.
love makes seman taste better
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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