Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
