What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
