Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
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