Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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