Heybabeimwearingurpanties
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
