I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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