I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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