the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
