Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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